I was not magnificent.....
When my littlest was under 2 years old I found out that I had to have a surgery that would put to an end my ability to be on the ice. To many people this would be an "Eh." moment in their life. For me, this was devastating. I had skated since the age of 4. I had been a skating professional. It had been my life. I loved figure skating...it was being yanked from my grasp and way too fast. Our town was getting a new multi-million dollar rink at the time and as a favor to me; my husband, myself and my daughter were allowed to skate on the surface before anyone else, save for a handful of people. A dear friend of the family called some favors and got us on the ice. I still treasure these photos, the last time I was on the ice.
We were a family of three at the time. My daughter was just 18 months old at the time. She was all smiles. I loved being on the ice with her and we had a blast skating as a family. One month later my spine was split open and the long march down a mess of tangled surgeries and unfulfilled promises began.
My daughter continually asked for skating lessons for her entire life. I always had excuses. It was so hard. I was able to coach her. What if she was hurt like I was? How could we go forward?
We got pregnant again and it seemed like maybe we'd take a break from all of the skating talk. And we did.....for awhile. It seems that you can only hide from things for so long. My daughter continued to want to skate. With her intense desire to skate, so came her brothers. After many excuses and reasons why it wouldn't work, we signed up for lessons.
The first week of lessons, after watching a woman work with my youngest, my littlest, whom I had never been able to be on the ice with, someone who was so sub-par in skating skill (brutally honest), I went home and cried for hours. If this disease had not robbed my of my balance, ability, stamina, life, I would have been on this ice with my little man instead of her. I had been used to the idea that I had to give up skating until it came to my children Then to see that someone so sub-par be allowed to teach by children.....It make me wonder what I did to anger God. What I did to make this punishment proper. As Johnny Cash says "You can have it all, my empire of dirt"
That's how I feel. I feel robbed. Sub-par people working with kids to teach them what I could. I feel strangled at the sidelines. I feel like a person without a country. I was am accomplished skater, then proven ranked Professional Skater Association and Director of Wissahickon Skating Club. Karen on the other hand had never done anything at all. The most she had ever done was....well, she had had swooped in while I was helping out.
When my littlest was under 2 years old I found out that I had to have a surgery that would put to an end my ability to be on the ice. To many people this would be an "Eh." moment in their life. For me, this was devastating. I had skated since the age of 4. I had been a skating professional. It had been my life. I loved figure skating...it was being yanked from my grasp and way too fast. Our town was getting a new multi-million dollar rink at the time and as a favor to me; my husband, myself and my daughter were allowed to skate on the surface before anyone else, save for a handful of people. A dear friend of the family called some favors and got us on the ice. I still treasure these photos, the last time I was on the ice.
We were a family of three at the time. My daughter was just 18 months old at the time. She was all smiles. I loved being on the ice with her and we had a blast skating as a family. One month later my spine was split open and the long march down a mess of tangled surgeries and unfulfilled promises began.
My daughter continually asked for skating lessons for her entire life. I always had excuses. It was so hard. I was able to coach her. What if she was hurt like I was? How could we go forward?
We got pregnant again and it seemed like maybe we'd take a break from all of the skating talk. And we did.....for awhile. It seems that you can only hide from things for so long. My daughter continued to want to skate. With her intense desire to skate, so came her brothers. After many excuses and reasons why it wouldn't work, we signed up for lessons.
The first week of lessons, after watching a woman work with my youngest, my littlest, whom I had never been able to be on the ice with, someone who was so sub-par in skating skill (brutally honest), I went home and cried for hours. If this disease had not robbed my of my balance, ability, stamina, life, I would have been on this ice with my little man instead of her. I had been used to the idea that I had to give up skating until it came to my children Then to see that someone so sub-par be allowed to teach by children.....It make me wonder what I did to anger God. What I did to make this punishment proper. As Johnny Cash says "You can have it all, my empire of dirt"
That's how I feel. I feel robbed. Sub-par people working with kids to teach them what I could. I feel strangled at the sidelines. I feel like a person without a country. I was am accomplished skater, then proven ranked Professional Skater Association and Director of Wissahickon Skating Club. Karen on the other hand had never done anything at all. The most she had ever done was....well, she had had swooped in while I was helping out.
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